1. I miss you everywhere. On my lips, between my thighs, the emptiness surrounding my fingers. My shoulder blades ache for your back against them, your chest to my chin, they all feel your absence like a sharp pain. It recedes in the daylight but roars loudest right before I fall asleep, always thinking of you.
2. I walk around like a spectre, haunting those places we visited in my mind, wondering if they’re any different than they were months that feel like years ago.
3. I feel like a a drunken slob trying to pick up a lucky penny off the floor: repeating myself and begging for the mercy to change a penny into a dime.
4. I went to happy hour with my co-workers today, one of which I have a crush on, only to find out a crush is good for sipping but I wish to drink you in like champagne stars, hurriedly and ecstatic. I find out he’s nothing like you. And that’s a problem for me because not even a xerox copy would do the trick, how could he compete?
5. My laughter feels like an old sitcom laugh track. Heard that before, they think, a weak smile slathered on their faces. I haven’t laughed without being reminded of you since I was with you. So really, I haven’t laughed at all.
6. I would beg for you, if it meant anything. But that would be like screaming at a fallen wall: pointless. The looks I’d get alone are debilitating. Still, I try until my knees ache with pity. I’ll never get used to the feeling of breathing without you.
Empire State Building, from the Williamsburg Bridge, NYC
yes, today I am 24 and yes that is a shark on my bed WHUT
CAUSE IT’S MAH BIRTHDAYYYY
(and I’m on Tumblr. Also have work today…)
YOU GUYS, I MADE VIRTUAL SAMSON.
The best gift you can give is ideas. My amazing soul sister theasiangirl got me the COOLEST book ever! Conceived by JJ Abrams & written by novelist Doug Dorst, this story has a story layered on top with notes passed between two readers in the margins of the novel. It has postcards, hand drawn maps and newspaper clippings shoved inside and is BRILLIANT. I can’t wait to dig into this literary feast. Thank you for the best book I’ve ever been gifted! 📚📓🙌💛👯xx